Encouraging Homework Excitement: Strategies for ALL Students

Homework - the time of day many parents dread. Many families struggle with homework being a huge battle but - does it have to be this hard?

Unfortunately, that is not a simple answer. Personality, motivation, learning style, emotional mindset, maturity, and environment can all play a role in just how big a battle homework becomes. The important thing to remember is that we can control some of that - and we should really only be focusing on those things that we can control!

The AI outline for this blog suggested I write it to tell parents that with the right kind of environment, ANY child can be excited about learning outside the classroom and doing homework. Y’all, let’s be honest, that is total BS. The cold, hard truth is that a lot of kids, probably MOST kids, will never enjoy homework. So where does that leave us as parents?

Why Students Struggle with Homework Motivation

In order to better understand our role, we also need to have a better understanding of our children. Knowing the root cause(s) of homework resistance can help understand what level of support to provide. In general, best practices for successful homework sessions include:

• Having a designated space to work, free from distractions
• Assisting with organization, planning, or other executive functions your child may not yet have developed
• Use timers or other tools to balance working time with breaks
• Listen to your child’s needs about whether or not they need a break right after school, or whether they prefer to knock it all out immediately
• Allowing as much independence as possible

Motivation is a key part of homework completion, but it is also one of those factors over which we have very little control. Perhaps your child does not feel that the homework connects to their real life, or maybe they are overwhelmed with time management demands. Even learning differences or lack of confidence can crush their drive.

Having a discussion with your child about these things is important. We cannot control the actual assignments sent home or the consequences they will face at school, but we can listen to them about how they would best feel supported in addressing these factors. Oftentimes, children are triggered just by their parents even offering help! This can be frustrating, but it might be a sign for us to step back and allow our children to learn about success and failure on their own, without us checking all of their work. (I know, it is a difficult one to let go.)

Shifting Mindsets: From Obligation to Opportunity

Interestingly, if we are able to let go of micromanaging our children’s school work, we may be giving them exactly what they need to reframe the idea of homework. By allowing our children to fail or succeed on their own without our interference or help, we can in turn reframe homework as a chance to master skills independently and assert their own identity.

Along these same lines, it is important to celebrate effort, not just results. Praising your children for consistency, perseverance, creativity, and independence - regardless of the grade or outcome - is crucial for their development. You can also encourage them to engage in reflection about their assignments by asking questions about how they approached tasks, what felt most overwhelming, or what the most interesting part of the assignment was.

When it comes to preserving your relationship with your child, it may just be time to move to a “progress over perfection” model in regards to homework.

Focusing on the Things We CAN Control

Watching helplessly while your child bombs an assignment, chooses not to complete something, or haphazardly throws something together that you know is beneath their ability is difficult. However, taking a cheerleader role instead of a supervisor is likely to play a huge factor in helping with homework struggles.

Here are some of the things you CAN control to help with homework struggles:

• Provide a non-distracting setting
• Allow for movement breaks, brain breaks, or provide tools like standing desks to meet your child’s physical and sensory needs
• Allow children to set their own schedules for when to tackle homework
• Encourage autonomy by allowing children to complete assignments on their own
• Build communication between home and school so that you are in the loop without your child feeling like you are overbearing
• Step away if you feel yourself losing your temper to prioritize your relationship with your child
• Praise effort and progress over perfection

When All Else Fails…

My oldest daughter has dyslexia. How perfect, right? I am a dyslexia therapist, so I am fully qualified to help her! Our family lucked out. I will never have to pay a fortune to a therapist to get her extra help outside of school, because I can just do it myself. WRONG!

My daughter hated reading, hated doing homework, and got more frustrated when working with me than with any other person in the world. This is normal and natural. As parents, our children want us to be sources of unconditional love. They do not want us to take off the “mommy hat” and be a teacher. They feel most comfortable with us, and thus, we also get to see them as their absolute worst. They know we will love them anyway, so they take full advantage of that concept when it is time for homework.

So guess what I did. I hired one of my own teachers to work with my daughter. Yup - I had an LD Expert teacher meet with my own child for dyslexia therapy. And wouldn’t you know, it worked! It removed a huge stress on my relationship with my daughter, and it gave her the support she needed without the daily arguments. Dare I say she truly enjoyed her tutoring sessions and built a lovely relationship with her therapist?

Conclusion

At the end of the day, homework doesn’t have to define the emotional tone of your evenings. It’s okay if your child never learns to love homework; what matters more is that they feel capable, supported, and respected in how they approach it. This might even involve watching your child fail (within reasonable limits, of course).

By focusing on the things within your control, the environment, your reactions, and the encouragement you offer, you’re teaching far more than academic skills. You’re modeling patience, resilience, and trust. And those lessons will carry far beyond the homework table. If you want help with all of this, Schedule a consultation today!